dysdhousewife: Perhaps this is why so many of them have *names*. :P... [go]

Chris: Oh no. Sorry it wasn't real!... [go]

Laura: hahahha, zeker de Lama's gekeken afgelopen vrijdag? Moest ik ook ... [go]

Lisa: It's enough to make you cry when you realize that it's all a drea... [go]

alison: Sigh. I was woken up from a great dream like that, only involvin... [go]

Last night, I won a million.
How I became a retired Airforce fighter pilot at age 15
Penis conversations
Time catcher
Stowaway Roo
Mom?
9 months
We're prepared!
When did love become a political thing?
The moms vs. the people (or what they think)

101 in 1001 days
Bits & bytes
Blogtistics
Books
Dear diary weblog
Dot dot dot
Down memory lane
Funny
Have you heard THAT??
Hmmmm
Holiday
House
Linky love
Me
Meme
Misc
Miss Media
Monday daddy day
Monday's Caption Time!
Monkey
Movies
Music maestro please
note to self
Parenting
Party!
Photo Q&A
Pictures
Recipes
Roo
School
Theme Thursday
Thinking out loud
Tourists in our own county: exploring The Netherlands with two small children
UnDutchable
Weekend
When kids start to talk
Woo hoo!
Work
Your tour guide!
Zoo

November 2008
October 2008
September 2008
August 2008
July 2008
June 2008
May 2008
April 2008
March 2008
February 2008
January 2008
December 2007
November 2007
October 2007
September 2007
August 2007
July 2007
June 2007
May 2007
April 2007
March 2007
February 2007
January 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
January 2006
December 2005
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
May 2005
April 2005
March 2005
February 2005
January 2005
December 2004
November 2004
October 2004
September 2004
August 2004
July 2004
June 2004
May 2004
April 2004
March 2004
February 2004
January 2004
December 2003
November 2003
October 2003
September 2003
August 2003
July 2003
June 2003
May 2003

Counter disabled

main page
e-mail me
follow me on Twitter

 subscribe in a reader


I'm Nadine. Mother to the Monkey (2 years) and his baby sister (born this January) and married to my wonderful loving husband FreezeM.. I was born August 8 1978, so I'm ... almost 30 (eeeek)! I work part time, although now I am enjoying my parental leave until this summer!




Hilarious doesn't even begin to describe it.


Just when you thought you knew what food was, Pollan shows you really didn't.


Bloggers I met
The roll

Blogroll Me!
* = recently updated


Design by: me

Syndicate this site!

Powered by Movable Type 4.0-beta6-20070710


This blog is licensed under a
Creative Commons License.










September 19, 2007

I'll probably be fine

This is probably the most personal, emotional post you'll ever read on my blog. Though I am still in doubt I want to share this with the world, my blog is my outlet. And I really need to write this off my chest before I start climbing walls. So here it goes.

Today I found out I probably have a 2.8 inch cyst in one of my ovaries. 'The Thing' as my husband and I call it, has not caused me to have any inconvenience. And had it not been for the ultrasound, I would not have discovered it. Now it has to be removed, maybe during this pregnancy.

I say I probably have a cyst, because that is what the gynecologist told me this morning. I have faith in him, he seemed good and professional. But I would not rest my faith in the medical people I met before and after him:

Midwife: At 9 weeks, I had enormous pain. I was unable to stand or walk properly for a couple of days. 'Your womb is growing very fast. It's normal' the midwife said. For a week I felt guilty for not able to get up and take care of my family because of a normal pregnancy symptom. Today I found it probably wasn't a symptom, the cyst made my ovary twist.

Ultrasound woman #1: At my 12-week, ultrasound-woman #1 saw 'The Thing' and said it probably was poo. Not to worry, she said.

Doctor: I asked my regular doctor when I visited him about a splinter in my foot, about 'The Thing' too. 'No complaints?' He asked. Nope. Not to worry. 'Let them check at your 20-week ultrasound'.

Ultrasound woman #2: At my 20-week she confirmed The Thing was still there. Our happy baby moment was a little overshadowed with this conclusion. She said 'It's probably just tissue. But let you gynecologist check.'

Midwife:
We called the midwife. She has to make the appointment with the gynecologist. 'It's probably just a Uterine Fibroma. It's harmless. No need to hurry.' She first scheduled our appointment ONE month from now. But we made her set the appointment for today. It just did not feel right.

The gynecologist said: 'It's probably a cyst'. He explained it and told us it won't harm our little girl. But I may have to get surgery soon, because of the size. It could burst (ew) or my ovary could twist again (ouch). Surgery would not harm the baby. He did want to have the radiologist confirm his thoughts.

The radiologist I was referred to this afternoon did not confirm or deny this conclusion after doing an ultrasound. He did not talk much actually, and when I got frustrated, laying there in nothing but my underwear while his assistant stared at me hopelessly and a strange doctor walked in out and without introducing or excusing himself, not getting any answers to my questions, I desperately asked: the thing I really want to know, is that I don't have cancer. 'Probably not' was his answer. I'll stick that political correct answer right next to my 'Thing'.

Tomorrow at 13.20, we'll find out what it 'probably' is and if when I need to have surgery.

My mind says me and the little girl growing inside me will probably be fine.

My worried heart says I could very well have cancer.

Today I looked at Tim and the very thought of having cancer and dying tore my heart apart. I want to hug him, see him grow and comfort him and give him a baby sister. And guide and watch them both grow into adults, ready for the big world. Words cannot describe how I felt hugging him on the kitchen floor and having doubts about being able to be his mom for years and years to come.

I'll probably be his mom for years and years to come. I'm probably too worried and being an emotional pregnant woman is not helping. My mind says I'll probably be just fine. But my heart will be unsure until tomorrow afternoon.

Posted at 9:41 PM


Comments

If the radiologist there are anything like the ones here, they are not supposed to say anything that may sound like a diagnosis. Not because there is anything wrong, but because they are not doctors, and don't always have the training to make a diagnosis. Hope it turns out to be nothing more than a cyst.

Posted by: M@ at September 19, 2007 10:30 PM

Same story with my niece. They found a cyst on one of her ovaries during her pregnancy.

Long story and 3 years later: Tried surgery during pregancy - couldn't get it out. Fine no problem. Had healthy baby girl. Cyst moves to her left buttock. Remains for 3 years. This past Monday, she has it removed in under 2 hour surgery. Home in under 30 hours. Feels great and daughter will be 3 next week.

Whatever they tell you, there is someone else who went through exactly the same thing. And she and her daugher are absolutely fine.

As you and your new daughter will be.

Posted by: mar at September 19, 2007 11:28 PM

*hugs*

I understand being anxious. The possibilities are nerve-wracking. And I know this is easier said than done, but try not to worry much until you know something conclusive.

And know that no matter what happens, we all love and support you. I'm hoping for the best :-)

Posted by: Leah at September 20, 2007 12:53 AM

You don't know me, this is my first time posting. I just wanted to say that I hope it's just a cyst, and that it's easily fixable.

Posted by: Kate at September 20, 2007 2:07 AM

*hugs*

Like Leah said, try not to worry too much until you really know what's going on.

Thinking of you and hoping everything turns out ok. :)

Posted by: erica at September 20, 2007 3:37 AM

hugs nadine.


be well.

xo

Posted by: Pamalamadingdong at September 20, 2007 3:41 AM

Big ((hugs)) to you!

I have ongoing issues with ovarian cysts...but pregnancy resolved mine. The only time I haven't had them is when pregnancy hormones are in my body. Didn't they say anything about it going away on it's own?

Hang in there. I'm positive you'll be fine.

Posted by: Alissa at September 20, 2007 4:07 AM

Your worry over this is completely understandable. But I'm hoping and praying for you that everything will be fine.

Posted by: Colleen at September 20, 2007 4:42 AM

I so understand the worry. But I'm betting it is indeed a cyst, and those are treatable.

I've had problems with them since I was a teenager. I once raced to the doctor convinced I had appendicitis because it hurt so badly. I've never had to get one removed, but I know that's sometimes necessary when they get to a certain size, or, as you described, when they cause the ovary to twist.

I know you're going to worry, because we all would. But it sounds like it is probably a cyst, and those are something that can be taken care of -- or even left alone, in many cases.

Let us know how it goes. Hang in there.

*hugs*

Posted by: Arkie Mama at September 20, 2007 5:10 AM

You're in my prayers!

And just remember, this will only make you stronger.

Posted by: Chantelle at September 20, 2007 5:58 AM

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you. Thanks for sharing and I'll keep you in my thoughts. :)

Posted by: Laura at September 20, 2007 7:21 AM

Oh, hon...you'll be around to torment your kids for a long, long time. I'm sending you all the good karma I can spare...everything will be fine!

*hugs*

Posted by: Lisa at September 20, 2007 5:49 PM

probablys always suck.
hugs.
hoping for the best for you!

Posted by: ali at September 20, 2007 8:32 PM

Wow, sorry I am so late on this one. I bet you are scared to death. I will hurry up and read your other update, hopefully it has good news. Until then, I am thinking of you and sending hugs.

Posted by: aimee/greeblemonkey at September 24, 2007 3:06 AM

Oh man! I hope that everything is ok with you. You're in my thoughts and prayers.

Posted by: Mom On The Run at September 25, 2007 3:09 AM

Oh NO! I am way behind on reading blogs, obviously! I am so sorry...now I must read on...

Posted by: stepping over the junk at October 4, 2007 2:38 AM