When did love become a political thing?

When I finished this post, I asked myself:

How did this post become so political? Is was supposed to be about love.

Because last weekend was all about love. My husband and I celebrated our anniversary on Friday. Exactly 3 years after we ran of to Hawaii and got married on a magnificent beach while the sun set.

To celebrate our 3 years of marriage, we send the children to grandma and grandpa and went on a date; We had dinner at a terrific Spanish tapas restaurant and talked about our relationship, our children, our future and our dreams. With plenty of wine (and time) we slept in late Saturday to wake up on in a beautiful fall morning. It was warm, sunny and the sky had a breathtaking shade of blue which contrasted perfectly with the bright yellow and red fall leafs.

We took our time to get showered and dressed up. And off we went to our next party, the wedding of our two dear: M&R.

We've known M&R for almost five years. They're an awesome couple, meant to be and really, the only thing lacking in their relationship were matching rings. But this was the day rings would be shared and vows would be said.

M&R had various friends invited. Most of which we had met before. It's the most diverse company you'll ever see at a party: Portuguese, British,Canadian, German, Colombian, Iranian, Dutch people and I probably forgot a few nationalities. People talked (very accented English, so funny), laughed, drank, enjoyed the scenery, the weather, the happiness.

Every ingredient for a perfect wedding was there on that beautiful Saturday afternoon. Everything, except their family.

The ceremony was still fun and beautiful, the skies were that gorgeous shade of bright blue, and the trees were showing magnificent colors. But even though my husband and I choose to get married without our family, thousands of miles away, I felt a bit awkward about the missing family. Like eating your favorite soup with a fork.

You see, M&R are American. They have lived as expats in The Netherlands for quite a few years.

You could say they eloped. Like my husband and I.
You could say it's their choice to have no family present.
You could say it' the sad side of expat life. A life where your most of your friends are your (ex-) colleagues.
You could say they choose not to get married in their home country, with their family present.

But the fact is, R&M are gay. And their vows have no legal value in most countries.

They didn't elope to the perfect beach on a magnificent island to create a perfect moment to say I do. They eloped to liberality. To acceptance. To a possibility. But if they ever return to their home country (the country I love and would like to live in myself) their vows mean nothing (except for two states) legally.

When we think of our Hawaiian wedding, we smile. When I see R's face telling us why his family isn't there, I cry.

I hope they'll have the chance to celebrate their anniversaries in the country of their choice. Not bound by the legal borders of liberality within which they said: I do.