3 months

My sweetest Tim,

Today, you’re exactly 3 months old. In those months you’ve become such a huge part of our life’s, I can’t believe I ever took a breath without you by my sight.

From the moment I laid eyes on you, I’ve loved you and knew I never would want to live without you. Maybe I’m not objective, but you’re perfect in everything you are and do. When you first opened your eyes, I saw your father’s eyes. And I loved you even more.

You’re very happy and social. You started to smile and interact very early. You always seem alert and interested in other people and babies. But you don’t like big crowds and shopping. Some faces make you cry and some make you laugh.

We spend many hours laughing and singing together. You enjoy sitting with me, when I have pulled my knees up and you lean on them, facing me. We sing, laugh, coo and just be silly. Your favorite songs are 70’s songs: Kung Fu Fighting and Be my boogie woogie baby.

But you also love to play in your playpen. You wave your little hands to the things dangling from the baby gym. You make your little sounds and you laugh a lot. The mirror in the playpen scared you the very first time you discovered the other baby.

Just days ago you’ve discovered how to put your hand in your mouth. Only left though, the right hand has yet to be discovered. You like to be held up high and fly over mommy. And you like it when I hold my face real close to you.

Bath time is a real joy. We bath you every other day, always in the evening. We use the Tummy Tub and play your favorite nursery rhymes. My favorite bath time nursery rhyme is “Little Bo Beep”. My heart just melts away every time I hear it and see how you enjoy your bath. You used to cry when we took you out the tub, but you’re used to it now. And just before we get your pj’s on, dad gives you a nice massage. You really enjoy it and you smile as soon as your daddy rubs the massage oil on his hands.

I never thought nursing a baby would be so special. But it is. The moments I nurse are relaxing and special. You make the cutest little sounds when you’re drinking. Unbelievable my body produces enough healthy things to provide you with everything you need to grow.

Stomach cramps used to bug you in the evenings. They made you cry a lot. But your daddy knew just how to hold you so that the cramps didn’t bother you. You’ve laid this way, in his arms, tummy down, for many hours. When I stopped eating & drinking cow milk they disappeared. So no more cow milk for us. They say you’ll probably lose this allergy when you get older. I certainly hope so, because a lot of great foods contain cow milk (like pies!). I wouldn’t want you to miss out on all that.

You like to stay awake & explore the world during the day. If you take a little nap, it’s rarely longer than 20 minutes. But at night you sleep like a little angel. In fact, when we wake up at 8, we miss you and wished you’d wake up a little early. We sometimes peek into your room and see if you’re not a little awake. But when we walk in your room, and you’ve just woken up, you welcome us with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen.

The first 8 weeks or so you slept in a little bed on our bed. And now, you’re in your own room. I think it took me longer to get used to that, than you.

I miss you when you’re not around me. Like now, when you’re asleep.

Sweet little Tim, you’re all my dreams come true. Happy 3th month!

Love,
Mom

Silent nights... holy nights...

This morning Tim had his 3rd monthly check up & vaccinations at the pediatrician. I’m not particularly fond of our pediatrician. She’s not very sweet with Tim, she seems to be annoyed by crying babies and I’m sure if she’d auditioned for a role on Roald Dahl’s Witches, she’d got it. We were considering switching to another pediatrician office, but she was a bit nicer than the last time we were there, so I’ll give it another try.

On my way out, I was getting Tim ready for his ride home. It’s kinda like a big waiting area, with lots of toys, many tables to dress babies or change diapers on. There were like 5 other moms there with their babies and toddlers. In the mean while, the receptionist was planning our 4th appointment.

“Miss Sweety & little Tim, May 22, 9 AM, would that be convenient?” the receptionist called into the waiting area.

I smiled politely and asked if a little later was possible too. “Tim sleeps until 8.30, I’d hate to wake him up”.

OK bad Sweety. That wasn't very nice. I know most babies don’t sleep from 9 PM to 8ish AM. Ever since he was born (hey, even before that, in my belly!) he’s a good sleeper at night. It started from 12 to 5 at birth and it only got better every day. So I kinda understand some of the looks I got from the other mommies (they looked a bit tired too!).

I did get punished. When I got home after a 20 minute walk, I noticed the big lime green bib dangling from my back pocket of my jeans. I had noticed my behind got a little more attention than usual….and I thought it was because of my sexy jeans!

Our silly cat, Simba

He totally ignores Tim (which is a good thing).
He eats tissues. Preferable used ones.
He isn’t allowed to eat anything else than cat food. He does it anyway.
He chews on toes and socks.
When he’s in the mood, he enjoys frightening people with his Hannibal Lector stare.
He gets upset when I don’t hug him when I come home.
He eats green vegetables. Green, not any other colors!
He loves cheese too.
He climbs on people’s necks. Not just ours. But also people visiting!
He gets annoying at 8.30AM and 8.30PM
He gets fed at 9:00AM and 9:00PM (see a connection there?)
He loves our other cat, Moby.
But he’ll never admit that.
He hunts his own tail. He’s no Einstein.
He sometimes pretends to be a bunny and lies in the rabbit cage.
Oh, he eats hey too.
He gets medicine for food allergy.
It really doesn’t surprise me he has a food allergy.
He loves to sit in plastic shopping bags.
When I make the bed, he gets under the sheets. Every single time.
He tries to escape every time I get home.
He cannot catch flies or other bugs. He’s just not that smart.
He likes to sleep on the dryer and jump in the refrigerator
But is afraid of our vacuum cleaner and iron board.

Just recently we can add another silly thing to this list. He jumps on top of one of our doors:

And when he’s on the door? He doesn’t know how to get off it. Did I mention he’s not that smart?

I wouldn’t mind him jumping on the door, if Tim’s playpen wasn’t just next to it. So any creative ideas to keep him off the door & out of the playpen are highly appreciated!

How the little bun came out of the oven

Finally, I finished writing Tim's birth story. I know some of you have been waiting for it. Sorry it took me so long. At the end I’ll also give you a little insight giving birth in my country.

Here it goes….

A jazzy night!
Januray 29th Mr. Sweety & I visited a friend from school, who just became father himself. When we got home we ate last night’s macaroni dish. Which caused me to have cramps about an hour after dinner .... or so I thought. But the cramps dissapeared an at about 9.30 we decided to play a game of Scrabble (In the last weeks of my pregnancy we played quit a lot of Scrabble). It was really cozy: we snuggled together on the couch, had some hot tea, chocolates, candles and some soft dinner jazz was playing. That’s when the cramps came back!

Is this it?
First, I thought it was the macaroni giving me a hard time again (Hey, who would expect to have contractions at 9 months pregnant?). I didn’t think much of it, and the cramps went away again and we continued playing (I was winning!). An hour later I started to feel.. well, not so well I guess. The cramps were back, but more painful and I needed to lay down. Mr. Sweety followed me and together we sat on the bed.

We felt a bit nervous and figured out SOMETHING was going on. And honestly, at that point I knew the little bun was ready to come out of the oven: these were the first signs of contractions.

I think there wasn’t an emotion we didn’tfeel at that moment. It felt like the world stopped turning, and it was just us. Only hours before our lifes would change forever. And we were trying to analyze: is this IT? Or are these like fake pre-contractions? Will it take 10 hours… or maybe longer? OMG, are we even READY for this baby??
We were nervous, giggling and very curious about what was going to happen next. But we didn’t have time to answer all these questions. Every contraction that came was more intense than the one before.

OK, now THAT hurts
And soon, I found myself, still on the bed on hands & knees (as I learned at pregnancy yoga). It was my way to deal with the pain. We talked about when to call the midwife. Now, we were told that you’re not supposed to call the midwife until you have contractions every 3 minutes, for at least ONE hour. To be objective, Mr. Sweety wrote down when the contractions came. Yes on bed, on the Apple, in an Excel sheet! Haha! We’re geeks, we can’t help it!

He was really sweet, massaging & rubbing my back, saying sweet things. I remember I could still hear the Dinner Jazz CD playing in the background. We thought we’d just sit like that for an hour.

But after only half an hour I just couldn’t handle it anymore. I felt very painful contractions in my belly AND in my lower back. I didn’t know how to breathe correctly. I was feeling dizzy and very afraid.

So we decided to not wait an hour, and call the midwife.

While Mr. Sweety was on the phone I just sat down in the bathroom. There was no pause between the contractions, and I felt pain constantly. I was feeling desperate. I knew there was no return or pause. How could I possibly deal with this pain for like 10 more hours? I felt like I was weak: feeling desperate after only an hour of contractions. How on earth could this be the way so many women gave birth?

At this point my mind was not completely clear. Between every contraction I just closed my eyes and sort of drifted into my own world. Crazy thoughts ran through my mind: I wanted to go to the hospital for pain relieve, or better yet, a C-section! I thought “Never again!” And I cried a lot, but without tears. I did not know what to do with myself and ended up on the floor, in the shower, clinging to Mr. Sweety, crying that I wanted the pain to go away.

Where did you want to deliver?
At 12 AM the midwife, Erica, arrived (about 15 minutes after Mr. Sweety had her on the phone). I was very relieved someone was there who knew what to do! And she really did a great job. She was only 24 years, but had the confidence as if she has done this work for ages. She told me how to breath (because I was on the verge of hyperventilating). Between two contractions, Mr. Sweety and Erica helped me out of the bathroom and on the bed. Then she checked how far I was dialated.

Erica asked: Where did you want to deliver? At home? Or in the hospital?
I answered that if this was going to take another 10 hours, than hospital and a LOT of drugs please.

Than she held up 8 fingers. I was 8 cm dialated (for those who don’t know, 10 cm is fully dialated, which means you’re about to have a baby!) We decided to stay home (did we really have a choice?) like we had planned. Erica ran out to get her things. I heard her running up and down the stairs. Getting all her things & equipment ready. That was the most reassuring sound I had ever heard in my life. I knew the pain wouldn’t last much longer.

Almost there!
At 12:30 I was fully dialated and she broke my water. The painful contractions were completely gone and I was allowed to push. For about half an hour I didn’t feel any pain, and to be honest, I wasn’t quite sure when to push. I even was enjoying it.

I sort of was expecting the pushing part not to take a full hour though! It was hard work, but nothing compared to the contractions earlier that night. It was very special, Mr. Sweety was holding my hand and encouraging. Erica making sure the baby was doing OK and also encouraging me. They made me feel like I could do it.

And I could! At After an hour of pushing, Tim was ready to join his mom & dad. Erica delivered him, and lay him down on my breast, at 1.38 AM, January 30th. And for a few minutes we just looked at him, hold him, cuddled him and loved our perfect baby boy, little Tim.

So that’s our story. I’m very grateful for my healthy baby boy and for the relatively quick & easy way he made it to the world.

Thanks for reading and thank you Mr. Sweety for being the perfect husband and the best support I could have ever wished for that January night. It was nothing like I had expected, it was everything I could have wished for.

In my country...
Just to put my experience in perspective, let me give you two statistics about giving birth in The Netherlands (because I know most of you are from the US):

8% of all Dutch women choose to have some sort of painkiller
30% of all Dutch women give birth at home

When I just found out I was pregnant I said: I want to deliver in the hospital with a lot of painkillers. I thought the Dutch birth culture was barbaric!
As you know by now, Tim was born at home, without any pain relieve. It was the most intense and most beautiful experience in my life. If I could go back, I wouldn’t change a thing.

Good things come in threes

1: Happy 30th Birthday Mr. Sweety!!!

Mr. Sweety turned 30 today!! He had a small surprise dinner yesterday. I actually managed to keep it a surprise from him. It wouldn't have been possible without the help of our friends. They hosted the party, I only had to lure Mr. Sweety to their house. I told him we were going to drop Tim of to go out to dinner. He did not liked the idea of dropping him just yet! So he was VERY happy with his surprise dinner.

Most of our friends are actually not from The Netherlands. It was a very international dinner!

Dessert anyone?

Mr. Sweety got a lot of nice gifts. I guess turning 30 means getting spoiled on your birthday!

2: Happy 6 months anniversary!

Today, we've been married 6 months. I can only say my life is so perfect right now. Married to the love of my life, mother to the sweetest little boy on earth. I'm very gratefull.

3. Baby milestone!

Tim sucked his tumb for the very first time. He did it before, but not this long. Why is it good? I don't know, but it's very cute AND I got it on camera:

BTW: I am still working that birth story! I'll post it AFTER my school exams. Yes, I said school exams. CRAZY. Crazy I tell you. Wish me luck.