The hospital revisited

The good: The baby is fine. I am fine.
The bad: I spend hours in the hospital yesterday and Hugh Grant was no where to be found.
The ugly: read on. But I have to warn you, there will be talks about things like vagina and cervix.

I spend a good part of the day in the hospital yesterday, with my darling husband by my side. For the last three weeks, I have had - now I hope I use the correct term - quite a bit of Braxton-Hicks contractions. They mostly occur after a few hours at work, which is no surprise since I've taken over a colleague's work since she's called in sick little over a month ago. Working two jobs, but in the same hours, has been a bit stressful. Hence the stress related 'contractions'. Yesterday they peeked which left me with a belly hard as a leather ball from little before lunch until I went to sleep. I could not even walk to the tram to get home. FreezeM came to pick me up with the car. So early yesterday morning, I called the hospital, just to be sure nothing was wrong. I have had the same thing with Tim, and with Tim I just quit working a few weeks before my maternal leave, and that fixed the problem.

The assistant on the phone thought it was likely the stress at work, but after consulting the gynocologist, she insisted I came over to the hospital immediately. She directed my to go straight to the delivary ward at the hospital. But not to panic, I'll probably be fine.

PANIC.

So I called FreezeM, who was on his way to work, and he said he'd like to come with me. So I called the hospital again, and asked if it was OK if I came in an hour, so my husband could come with me. OK she said, no hurry.

NO hurry. Check.

The fun began when we arrived at the delivery ward (note: before the hour passed). A nurse in total panic flew up to us and screeched "What took you so long?" Than she directed me to the delivery room where she asked "26 weeks?" "Contractions!" She was ready to get this baby. I kid you not. So FreezeM politely said we were not there to give birth, we were worried about the hard belly. "But she's only 26 weeks along, premature!" When we calmed her down (serious), she explained all the exams they were going to do.

Measuring the 'contractions'
FIrst she hooked me up to a machine that measured the ehm.. strength of my contractions - which clearly I wasn't having, but she did not believe me - So after 45 minutes we could all conclude I was not in labour. Genius.

The doppler
We listened to the heart beat of our little baby girl. Perfect. She was just fine. I wasn't the slightest worried about her health, since I can feel her doing the mambo like the entire day (1 2 3 kick mommy's blather right 2 3 turn turn twist 1 2 3 kick mommy's blather left 2 3)

What's with all the pee?
Since I'm pregnant, the medical people seem to be highly interested in my pee. Second on the nurses' list of possible causes of the Braxton Hicks was a blather infection. I insisted I had no such thing, but she would not let me get out of peeing in the cup. I think there is a highly kept secret that pregnant pee is actually fluid gold and doctors are selling it on the black market. She took of with my pee, never to return. Thus proving my theory!

The fingers
NOTE: After this point I might mention the word vagina. You're warned!
After the nurse stole my pee, a gynecologist came to feel if my cervix wasn't dilated. Which it wasn't. Though not a pleasant exam, it was way more comfortable than the internal ultrasound they gave me after that.

The condom wearing sex toy
Did you know an internal ultrasound thing looks like a very slim vibrator with a oversized condom? There where two gyno's and an assistant present for this exam and FreezeM. What can I say. My vagina is popular. Gyno #1 wasn't there for the exam, she just wanted the machine for the next 'patient'. But when she thought gyno #2 was taking too long, she offered to help. She almost started a bitch fight! And took over the procedure. (Hey, don't I have any saying in how puts what in a my vagina?) But gyno #1 wasn't aware of my file, did not know of the cyst, and a few seconds she just stared at the screen, not knowing what to do. The assistent saved her ass by asking me if I was aware of the ovarian cyst. Which she knew I was, because she cleary read my file.

To conclude this story: everything is just fine. But I need to take it easy at work, or stop. I already confronted my boss about it, a few weeks ago. But I'll just have to talk to him again, ASAP.

PS 1: I wrote this down as a funny experience. It was not: I was in tears when I had to rush to the hospital. Though the overreacting nurse was funny, the whole experience scared the living crap out of me. But I did not want to make this post more dramatic than it already is.

PS 2: I do agree with the hospital exams: better safe than sorry. Even if it means people sticking things in my vagina.

PS 3: I feel massively guilty for not having my priorities straight. Clearly my baby is more important than my job. By far. I guess this is the balance working mommies have to keep finding. Even part time working mommies like me

PS 4: I figured the camera ultrasound thing and other hospital footage could be live entertainment for patients! Pay per view. Not reality TV , but relativity TV, we'll call it: "And you though your dialysis was bad, look what the patient next door is examined for!".

Boys boys boys

Tim is a boy boy. At least, as far as you can tell a 20 month year old is boyish.

He's still OBSESSED with playing soccer. It is uncanny how well he plays and how fast he learns new ways to kick the ball. And he hasn't even been allowed in the Socatots club (toddler soccer club) here in The Hague because there were too many applicants. He's on a waiting list, (but clearly not waiting):

(photo courtesy of my dad)

Than there's the cars. When he's not playing soccer, he's playing with his 'toot toots'.

Studying to be a fireman...

While driving a school bus (hey, nowadays the youth MULTITASKS)

But yesterday I really had prove he's a boy boy. When I went on a shopping spree with my mother in law, I saw this cute purple skirt for our daughter to be (OOPS ALMOST TYPED HER NAME). It's way too big, but I asked Tim to come over. I held the skirt in front of him to see what it would look like. He grabbed my hand, loudly and offended said NOOOOO and pushed the skirt away. I know. How DARE I do such a horrible thing.

Anyways, the result of the shopping spree are two winter coats for Tim and these little outfits for....

Notice how she won't fit into almost any of those clothes until she's like 3 months (or older, the coat is for 6 month olds).

Anways, where was I?

Boyish boys. Yeah. Tim is a boy boy.

And cute.

Tim's tiny tale #1: Cut!

........

After that, Tim was done with the camera action. I promise pictures later. It looks nice, even though we obviously had no clue what we were doing.

'#1' in the title suggest I might do more of these little tale / presentations of Tim. What do you think internet people?

Hugh Grant will be delivering our baby

My gynecologist looks exactly like Hugh Grant. That's what I found out today when we went for our first regular baby check up at the hospital. Hugh Grant, and I am not kidding you. They could be identical twins. None of the sexual fantasies I might or might not have had about Hugh Grant, involved me being naked squeezing out a baby.

I am not sure if I'm happy or slightly disturbed. Also the question rises: who had more ladies spread there legs? Hugh or his gynocologist twin brother? It's a close call.

I wonder what the rest of the gynecologist team looks like. I hope they're less rude than Hugh's assistant. We were a few minutes late....
Me: I'm sorry, I'm a few minutes late.
Assistant: You're late.
Me: I know, that's what I said.
Assistant: Pee in this cup and than wait for the gynecologist in the waiting room.

I smiled, feeling totally blessed I am not the one collecting urine of pregnant women the entire day.

Walking from Hugh the gynecologist to the hospital exit, Tim starts doing his sign for elephant. 'Where's the elephant?" I asked several times. He pointed into the hallway a couple of times, but I could not see an elephant. No photos, paintings, art, wallpaper in the shape of an elephant. But he kept doing his sign. And than I saw the elephant. A very obese woman wearing gray clothes walking a few meters in front of us.

Thank God for sign language.

Celebrating in Amsterdam

In a few days it will be our second anniversary. This weekend we dropped Tim of at my parents and we went of to Amsterdam. We were tourists in our own country and it was awesome.

It is all true what you heard about Amsterdam: prostitution is legal (the 'ladies' pay tax and can join a union) and VERY visible in Amsterdam's famous Red Light District. Where women take place behind red lighted windows and present their... ehm products. We WENT there! For the very first time. It was like walking in a surreal Dali painting. Mostly there were just tourists, like us, but there were also ehm.. potential customers for ehm.. the products. Even-though I am really tolerating and open about things, but I felt uncomfortable walking in this ehm.. shopping street. I do have to say I expected the women to be ugly ass crack junkies, but they were not. Au contraire: they were beautiful and I don't understand why the choose this ehm.. profession.

I didn't dare making a picture of the actual windows with the ladies. I mean, even though they're standing there in their lingerie, I must respect their privacy...

Also true about Amsterdam: the coffee shops, which don't primarily sell coffee but marihuana. Amsterdam is invested by these grass bars. And we almost accidently ended up in one looking for a normal bar. Smoking and selling marihuana is not legal in The Netherlands but it's tolerated (my country is too afraid to make a decision about the issue). Making marihuana illegal will put the use of it in the criminal scene, which would lead to more criminality. Yet legalizing it, would be like saying it's OK to do it. Anyway, I think 75% of all Dutch coffee shops are located in Amterdam. So don't think that everyone in my country is a pothead, because most of the shops are located in Amsterdam.

We actually found a bar that wasn't a coffee shop and where we could sit outside and enjoy the warm night.

True: Amsterdam is where you can find the most and funny stand up comedy acts in this country. Before that picture of the bar that wasn't a coffee shop was taken, we enjoyed dinner and improvisation stand up comedy at the Boom Chicago Theatre! Awesome show, bad food. I got my well - done - because - I - am - pregnant - burger RAW three times. It was still MOOOOOING I swear.

Also true about Amsterdam: the many beautiful CANALS and many many MANY BIKES.

Another fact: those with interests in being all cultural: Amsterdam has to offer it all. A gazillion museums, (art but also history museums like the famous Anne Frank museum, a royal palace, amazing architecture and gorgeous houses. )

The Royal Palace

Also true: Amsterdam is a big tourist attraction. Where many tourists are, you can find many hotels. Our hotel was pretty, though I would not go back mainly because it was too noisy. We could hear the people above us walk around. Crazy! I did get to enjoy the sun from our window.

This was the FIRST time we actually went out with just the two of us and spend a night in a hotel since Tim was born. Though we missed him, we really enjoyed this mini anniversary break.

Warning: for all non Dutch men out there: taking your wife on your anniversary break and see the red light district in Amsterdam might be a fun, touristy and acceptable thing to do.. I wouldn't advise you to do the same in any other place of the world. Unless you don't really care about having another anniversary. Seeing whores is not considered romantic.

23 weeks

With Tim, I showed a belly picture on here before I was even showing. With our baby girl, I've waited until today. For no good reason. I slightly feel guilty about my been there - done that - feelings about this pregnancy. It may sound like I'm not grateful, but I assure you that's not the case. Tim is a time-consuming little toddler, so I have to divide my attention and, at least for now, the born wins over the unborn.

The 23 weeks belly:

SMILE, FreezeM said after seeing the result of the previous picture.

OK, another one. CHEESE.

Small belly? Try to ride a 3 wagon train on your belly. Grand central station is NOTHING compared to my belly.

I also wanted to post a Tim giving his little sister a kiss - picture. He does it often. Apparently doing it on camera was NOT an option. I got a very clear NEE (which is NO in Dutch). Nee it is.

Dot dot dot

• Have you ever attended a meeting in one of those meeting rooms where there are no windows, too much chairs to seat too many people in a too little space, where the A/C doesn't seem to work and the temperature gets so high you think you're in the Sahara? I was in one of those for TWO and a half hours today. And I didn't realize it was THAT bad until halfway the meeting I went to the ladies room and while I sat on the potty, I enjoyed the fresh air.
• Sometimes I choose what to read based on the bestseller list (shut up). My method is no guarantee for a great read and it proves I am not the majority reading population. I hate Life of Pie and I can't seem to get through Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. The first book annoys me and the second book makes me so nervous my heartbeats rises and my right eye twitches.
• Speaking about books, Tim LOVES the books I get him from the library. He LOVES them so much, he tore a piece out of one so he could keep it. (NO honey, books are for READING) Normally the library makes you buy the book for the price of a new book. They sold me this one for 'only' 5 euros.
• I have been cooking and baking a lot last weekend. My favorites: pumpkin muffins, pumpkin spicy burgers, potato cookies, gingerbread apple pie. The pie was GREAT. I got the recipe from Vegan with a vengeance. Which is a must have cookbook even if you eat meat and fish like us! FreezeM made a Morracan meal today from that book and it was GREAT! We are not vegan, but we like to experiment with new foods and recipes and want to limit the amount of meat we eat. The book really is great.
• The weekend before our cyst - or other c - scare we went to the dunes and enjoyed the warm sun. While FreezeM and Tim played, I lay my big pregnant behind on a blanket eating candy. Seeing the men of my life play and enjoy themselves, one of those 'I can't be any happier' mood came over me. I snapped some shots of Tim that day, which I wanted to post sooner, but because of the cyst thing I never got around to look back on this gorgeous day. Here are my favorite photos: