Time catcher

running on the silvery beach
miles of sand and sea shelves
some broken into tiny pieces
some whole
after their unknown journey
the view of endless blue
the sound of calm
your innocent smile
your hair dancing in the wind
like time
I want to catch you
and keep you in my arms forever

2 years & 9 months

Dear Monkey,

Just 3 months away from your 3rd birthday. And little Monkey, you are independent. Eating, undressing, using the toilet, walking: you want to do it all by yourself. And we applaud you for it. You even went into a small store to buy a tram ticket while daddy waited at the door.

You talk. Oh boy you talk. Whole sentences, stories, jokes, puns. And you parrot and learn new words every day. Shame is no friend of you. "LOOK MOMMY A LITTLE MAN!" you said loudly when a little old man walked in the tram. We laughed, luckily old man are usually little and a little deaf.

Your passion is everything with wheels , construction, planes and helicopters. And you don't know it yet, as you are asleep, but we're going to visit a construction site later today. I can't wait to see your eyes. The little Einsteins, Handy Manny and The Backyardigans are your heroes.

We play music all the time. Your favorite instruments are the trumpet, drums and cymbals. You make us listen to classical music, band music and basically everything that has those 3 instruments in it. You could dance to The Elephant Mars of Jungle Book the entire day, and by now it's the most played song in our iTunes.

You are sweet, funny, smart, friendly, enthusiastic, talkative, energetic, cute and lovable.

I love you little Monkey,
Mom

Stowaway Roo

Arrrr.... what's that?

A stowaway on my ship! Arrr!

This is what I do with illegal pirates on my ship! Get of matey, ye silly bear. Arrrrrr!

Get of ye baby pirate! Yo-ho-ho!

Arrrr, you win. I'll walk the plank.

Ahoy! I'm the queen of the sea! Arrrrr!

The end....

Brought to you by the Lazy Sunday crew:

So we spend our morning on a ship. After seeing an episode of the Backyardigan's about pirates on the big bed while eating breakfast. Arrr! Lazy Sunday indeed mateys!

What did you do this weekend?

Mom?

Me (preparing the hot tub for Monkey and Roo): Yes honey
Monkey: Where is Elmo's speedboat?
Me: I don't know honey.
(walking of to Monkey's room to get his PJ's)
Monkey: I want to put it in the bath!
Me: I'm sorry honey, I don't know where it is. Maybe you can bring some other toy with you in the tub?
Monkey: I found the speedboat!
Monkey (running): Mommy, mommy I put it in the bath!
Me: That is great honey...
(walking back to the bathroom)..
Me: Honey, that is not a speedboat.
Monkey: OH.
Me: That is Roo's shoe.
Monkey: OH.

But you really can't blame me for just taking the shoe out, laughing my head of and kissing him. Could you have done anything else when he looks at you like this:

I didn't think so.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

9 months

My little Roo,

What a magnificent cheerful little girl you're becoming. You giggle, smile, coo, talk (in your own way :) and sing (again, in your own way). Your giggle is the most fascinating sound, and you like it when we imitate it. When we all (your father, your big brother and me) engage in this giggle feast, I am sure we sound like complete morons, but we have so much fun.

You absolutely hate to lay on your back. Because of that, diaper changes are a battle. I try to distract you with games, toys and singing, but nothing really works. Accept sometimes letting you chew on (clean) diapers does the trick. Your brother thinks it's the funniest thing ever shouting "THEEEERE SHE GOES AGAIN!" ("Daar GAAT ze weer!")

As much as you hate laying on your back, you LOVE the swing at the playground. Your little blond hairs dance in the wind and you let everyone know you're having the time of your life by doing your giggle. A lot of time you sit in your stroller and watch Monkey goof around, and you're OK with that. It won't be long before you're running around too.

Speaking about running: I caught you walking alongside the couch. You also used our kitchen step too walk. Sitting however, is not your thing. As soon as I let you sit on the ground, you turn around and crawl or climb right back into my arms.

You crawl at the speed of light! And you always head for the hallway, trying to chew on a shoe or the cat food. On two occasions I could barely rescue the food from your mouth.

You're also fond of people food. Broccoli and courgette are your favorite veggies. You are not a baby rice, oatmeal kind of girl. Only when I mix it with banana or pear you'll eat it. I am real proud of you for eating mashed foods instead of purees. You don't seem to mind the inconsistent character of non puree foods at all. You prefer to hold your own spoon while you're eating. It's kind of messy. You really love little pieces of bread with your lunch soup. Bread crumbs everywhere, but you really love to eat the pieces by yourself, grabbing them and squeezing them in your little fists making them all buttery. You'll try anything and so far I haven't found a food you really don't like. Hooray!

Your milk intolerance seems to be less, which is great. Just this morning I discovered a new rash on you big brother. After two days of having dairy ice cream. I'm glad you'll be able to eat ice cream without having to worry about how your body will react.

Roo, Roo, Roo, having you and your brother in my life feels so perfect. I don't want to miss a second of your life. It goes by quickly as it is. Being gone from home to work for 3 days a week has the great benefit that we can financially give everything to you and your brother. That we can do all these fun things. Buy many toys and the cutest clothes. Go on spontaneous trips. Buy organic food. Go on wonderful vacations. And don't have to worry about our finances. But the fact that I can't be with you and Monkey is difficult on me. More difficult than I ever imagined it to be.

I hear you just woke up from your nap. So I'll run to you little girl.

I love you always,
Mom

(PS: I am sorry I didn't write you your 8 months letter. There's no excuse other than the fact that I rather spend time with you than writing about you.)

We're prepared!

For something... anyway.

These photos inspired me to reinstate the weekly "caption time" I used to do on my blog. For this week, anyway. Weeklies don't really stick on this blog.

Go ahead, write a caption and make me laugh!
(and please try not to comment on our messy living room!)

When did love become a political thing?

When I finished this post, I asked myself:

How did this post become so political? Is was supposed to be about love.

Because last weekend was all about love. My husband and I celebrated our anniversary on Friday. Exactly 3 years after we ran of to Hawaii and got married on a magnificent beach while the sun set.

To celebrate our 3 years of marriage, we send the children to grandma and grandpa and went on a date; We had dinner at a terrific Spanish tapas restaurant and talked about our relationship, our children, our future and our dreams. With plenty of wine (and time) we slept in late Saturday to wake up on in a beautiful fall morning. It was warm, sunny and the sky had a breathtaking shade of blue which contrasted perfectly with the bright yellow and red fall leafs.

We took our time to get showered and dressed up. And off we went to our next party, the wedding of our two dear: M&R.

We've known M&R for almost five years. They're an awesome couple, meant to be and really, the only thing lacking in their relationship were matching rings. But this was the day rings would be shared and vows would be said.

M&R had various friends invited. Most of which we had met before. It's the most diverse company you'll ever see at a party: Portuguese, British,Canadian, German, Colombian, Iranian, Dutch people and I probably forgot a few nationalities. People talked (very accented English, so funny), laughed, drank, enjoyed the scenery, the weather, the happiness.

Every ingredient for a perfect wedding was there on that beautiful Saturday afternoon. Everything, except their family.

The ceremony was still fun and beautiful, the skies were that gorgeous shade of bright blue, and the trees were showing magnificent colors. But even though my husband and I choose to get married without our family, thousands of miles away, I felt a bit awkward about the missing family. Like eating your favorite soup with a fork.

You see, M&R are American. They have lived as expats in The Netherlands for quite a few years.

You could say they eloped. Like my husband and I.
You could say it's their choice to have no family present.
You could say it' the sad side of expat life. A life where your most of your friends are your (ex-) colleagues.
You could say they choose not to get married in their home country, with their family present.

But the fact is, R&M are gay. And their vows have no legal value in most countries.

They didn't elope to the perfect beach on a magnificent island to create a perfect moment to say I do. They eloped to liberality. To acceptance. To a possibility. But if they ever return to their home country (the country I love and would like to live in myself) their vows mean nothing (except for two states) legally.

When we think of our Hawaiian wedding, we smile. When I see R's face telling us why his family isn't there, I cry.

I hope they'll have the chance to celebrate their anniversaries in the country of their choice. Not bound by the legal borders of liberality within which they said: I do.

The moms vs. the people (or what they think)

The one thing that really gets to me about socializing as a parent, is the arrogance and judgmental attitudes of people towards parents they meet, talk with or just barely pass by in a crowded street.

When the baby is crying: "She must be hungry"
When the toddler is screaming to her mom: "The kid is out of control. Mom: you're a bad parent"
When the toddler refuses to eat one day: "The weaning must have gone wrong. Mom: you're a bad parent"
When the toddler refuses to sleep: "She never learned to sleep in her own bed. Mom: you're a bad parent"

And the list goes on and on.

I am seriously appalled by the conclusions people make after one single meeting with a kid. Or really anyone how isn't either one of the parents.

It's like sports championships: some people watching a sports game from the comfort of their homes are convinced they know better than the sports coach on the field. But the fact that sports is so much more than what surfaces on the television, is often ignored.

We've had quite a few different takes on parenting than is common in The Netherlands. So I am used to the looks and judgmental comments and gossip. For one, we learned Monkey sign language.

"SIGN language? WHY? He will be lazy and NEVER SPEAK!!!"

Than we made the 'weird' decision to only cook organic and home cook every meal

"Oh common! EVERYONE uses ready made baby food. Organic or not. You're overprotective. You're teaching him to be a fussy eater. A little pesticide has never hurt anyone."

And the fact that grandma comes to take care of Monkey and Roo instead of daycare...

"They will never socialize! You might as well send them off to the jungle and let them be raised by a bear like Mowgly. "

Than there's the fact that the average mom in The Netherlands breastfeeds her baby ONE month... With 8.5 months I am this very weird tree hugger hippy mom kind of person.

"You have got to learn them to be independent! Otherwise she'll want to breastfeed until she's 30! She will never learn to drink on her own!"

And I haven't even started to tell people that we won't be sending Monkey to preschool until he is at least 3 to 3.5 years old (2.5 years is common here).

"I don't think I heard you right.. 3 years you said? You might as well pre register him to an education and socialization camp!"

But every single parenting decision mentioned above has made, and still makes my children happy. They make my family happy. The make me happy. I am not saying they are perfect or even the best decision, they are just one possible way of raising our kids. OUR way of raising our kids.

And I hereby give the finger stick my tongue out to every person out there not respecting that.

"(THAT child has no manners!! Sticking his tongue out like that!)"