When 17 year olds discuss your (non existent) belly flab

A couple of weeks ago our little family went to a Liberation festival in the centre of The Hague. There was a lot of music and a special area for kids (read: where too many children are supposed to do uncoordinated coordinated activities but are totally going crazy accompanied (but not supervised) by their angry looking parents.

Anyway.

My husband took the kids to one of those horrifying activities (jumping pillow) for children and I strolled a little bit behind them. Did I say it was raining slightly too? Yeah. Suddenly this cute young man (about 17 or 18 years) walks up to me and asks me if I have some time.

I think he's from some sort of charity and I say:

"Sure" (I am glad not to be the one between the 100 other screaming kids where my husband is).

I wave at my husband who's now taking Monkey's shoes of so he can get on the jumping pillow. And sign him I'll catch up with him later.

The kid introduces himself, he's a little nervous and has apparently decided to try a little chit chat before coming to the point where he'd ask me money. So he looks at me, asks me if I have children and how old they are.

I say "I have a 3 y/o boy and a 1 y/o little girl".

And he says:

"Oooh, so than that post pregnancy belly flab must be gone by now"

I am not even joking.

So I think: OK where is the camera? And I look around if I see a camera crew between all the kids.

Than I burst into laughing.

"You've got to be kidding me!" I say.

But he goes on "No, really, I know women they always complain about belly fat after pregnancy"

"OK, stop there. I warn him. " (still laughing) "I am sure that if you would have said that to any other woman, you'd probably have two black eyes right now."

"But do you do sports?" he asks.

By now I am expecting Ashton Kutcher to reveal the cameras but no such luck.

I think my look kinda makes him realize he should come to the point.

I let him finish his talk about the charity and promise him to check their website online.

When I walk to my husband and children I tell them what happened. And than the weather gods decided to end the horrible child activities and lets rain come down like Niagara Falls.

We fled to a Mexican restaurant where an over sized sombrero ate our baby

and we drank large Mexican beers.

(excuse the lame quality camera phone pics)

I think of the kid and hope he takes my advise. Or else he'll definitely be the pinata with one of the ladies he's trying to befriend!

And for the record: I do not have a belly flab.

Good enough mom

My husband got me a rather unusual gift for Mother's day: a book called "Goodbye super mom, hello good enough mom". A book about giving up on being the PERFECT combination of mom, wife, employee etc.

So I thought about that gift and thought:

What no roses? Fine chocolates?

WHAT am I doing wrong? DO I act too much like a perfectionist? I'm not that bad! How can I a better mom?

...

Am I missing something? What can I change to do better?

...

Does he think I can't let go? I do relax you know, it's not like I am constantly cleaning or hovering over our children or anything.

...

He doesn't love me! He hates me as a mom. I suck as a mom. Do I suck?

...

Oh.

And then it hit me.

That was kind of the point of the book.

No?

Hmmm.

So I sat on the couch. Took a good look at our toy covered living room. And I said:

"I'm sitting here on the couch, I'd like some coffee, and don't expect anything more today, because I am good enough mom!"

Score!

Good enough mom: 1 Family: 0

I will do my utmost best to be the perfect good enough mom.

Seriously though. I kinda understand. I want every day to be perfect, to be full of joy, laughter, learning, trips while also having a clean & tidy house, be a good & loving mom and wife, doing good work at my 2 day-job, supporting my husband with his study, developing & learning myself, maintain friendships, visit family, do cultural stuff, house improvements, gardening while making sure every meal is home cooked, moments of relaxation, SPORTS (I started running ehmm two weeks ago) and for me very important: writing. Oh and reading. Without pressure of course.

WITHOUT ANY STRESS!!!

Actually I'm not that bad. I can accept that our house is never really that tidy, meaning you will always find toys somewhere. It's not dirty, but you know, you'll find a dust bunny under the couch. But I haven't really come to peace with that, does that make sense?

This is a more honest open post than I intended. I aimed for funny and instead you got serious. I should be a FUNNY perfect mom. No?

Yeah, I know. I need more balance. And do more writing. It helps to keep my head sane.

And maybe a little more photographing and actually undigitalize the photos we make.. baby album?

See how hard it is?

But ehm. Hubs; thanks. I guess.

Moms: can you be good enough mom? How do you do it?

Love and marriage

Husband and i talking about a wedding we'll be attending today.

Monkey: What does getting married mean?
Me: Well, getting married is when two persons love each other so much that they promise to be with each other for the rest of their lives.
Monkey: OK...
Monkey (pointing at his toys): I want the car!
Me: Yep, that's usually how it ends.

And then I put my little Van Gogh to work:

To see more children's art, be sure to visit the art carnival the ever so lovely Three Bay Chicks are hosting, here!